memoirs

I love being taken for granted.

It's always nice to take a walk in this cold cold night, blasting songs as I think about life. Feeling abit down now for one reason or another, one of it being my position to voice out during family gatherings. 

I dread hearing stories about maids being ordered to do chores that are a tad too draining for them. I mean, even if you're the one employing them, it does not give you a right to bully anyone. haaah. I fail to understand what the 'adults' are thinking sometimes. Guess I must be too immature to understand the need to show one's superiority in front of a maid. Why make a big fuss out of nothing? Why demand more than even you yourself can give if you were her? She is a human too, for god's sake. Treat her how you wish people would treat you.. Aren't you elders supposed to be the role models for my generation? 

Powerless ah, im powerless. Can't stop my team from losing, can't prevent anyone from being bullied. 

Can't sleep man :/ Wanna jog but I were to go I think i'll have a cramp in the middle of nowhere at 1am in the morning. Better not LOL. Maybe I should go to the chin ups corner. Gonna be a long long night again... 

I am tired, I'll just type what's on my mind. I hate this feeling of being a burden. After today, I seriously doubt my ability to control and kick a soccer ball. Never been this humiliated.

I don't wanna be anyone's burden anymore!

Don't wanna be the reason for losing..

I really wasted many people's time today. Sorry :(

I am really really really really sorry for letting down everyone :(

I promise I'll work harder than ever. I promise I'll never be complacent ever again. I promise I'll learn from my mistakes. I'll lay down my life. I don't wanna let anybody down ever and ever again T.T I'll nv be a burden again. I'll nv be lazy again.

I PROMISE I WILL IMPROVE! T.T

The hi-5s, pat on my back, nice messages, kind words. I'll never forget them. Thank you lovely friends, you guys blew some of the cloud away..

I love thoughtful people. Thank you to mummy for buying some bananas for me (=

Haha, it's judgement day!

I wanna win the medal so so much! But on the other hand, part of me wanna be up against better oppositions. I want this to be an opportunity for me to learn something. Yea, I sincerely wish for a team which is capable of beating my team soundly. I wanna learn more and be able to improve from this experience. (=

Failure will fuel success, let us be up against a good team tomorrow and may them trash us convincingly! I wanna know where I stand against the real pros.

May the better team win (=

I am a tad loony already. I never knew what you had for me. The one up there never fails to make me laugh at my innocence. What is it that you want...

Construction site. A family of 5. A narrow road. That tree root. And as I land face to face with you, I could almost hear you laugh. The whole of secondary 3 was not enough I guess.

To do that to me 5 days before an event I looked forward to, hah, plain masterclass. Maybe it's karma. Maybe it's just bad luck. Maybe it's me.

Maybe it's fate.

They say people who rely and push any blame to fate is a coward. I don't deny I am one. Laughable..

ah, I am starting to be very easily irritated, way too emotional for a guy :/ heh, couldn't care more already.



Luckily there's youtube and this movie about Ronaldinho's comeback made me smile lika mad kid. hahaha. During my younger days, just playing football was enough to make my day. But as we all grew older, we became more and more concerned with the results. Did we win? If we did, we celebrate. Lose? And we'll keep quiet for the rest of the day. Playing football was no longer an enjoyment. Thanks to this video, I was reminded that football is supposed to be fun. It's an outlet to express, to feel, and to believe in (= . And I love people who play with a smile on their faces, it makes football seem so honest, so so magical. I'll try to play happily on Wednesday :D

Lets try to be nice and play sportingly guys :D

Up to JS and I to steer the ship till 5pm when reinforcement's come.

Anticipating a through ball, I managed a feint before dashing past my marker. The ball is just ahead of me now! "Do I cut in? Or will I drag it to the sidelines?" those were what went thru my head for less than a millisecond, but before I could act, I felt my foot being clipped and I went tumbling towards the ground. Raising my hands as I looked towards the reff, I was appeased when I heard the whistle. All turned into dismay as the man in charge pointed to the other side, I was judged to have dived. Three or four of the other team surrounded me furiously, " Playing basketball ah?" one of them sneered.

I felt lonely.Maligned.Confused.

It was never about the referee's decision. What's applauding was the manner I was approached by the opponent after I was fouled. Fairness is nothing but a word people of higher authority use to justify their actions. No I don't blame the reff, people make mistakes. Just disappointed with humanity. How the guilty went up to confront the victim, I don't know.

You kicked me, asshole.

I don't cheat. I never will.

Currently waiting for 3pm to arrive, playing soccer later! And since many of the soccer Kakis are still online, I shall appear offline and wait for them to offline before i make my way there. HAHA.

Anw, Wednesday is approaching fast! Afraid? Of course I am. Can't seem to be able to control my legs freely whenever theres a competition. Needa score an early goal to settle my nerves..

Which yc will turn up? We'll see..